Gerrick took a deep breath, and pushed the door open.

He had expected the unexpected, a paradox that was destined both to be disappointed and satisfied simultaneously. In that regard, he was both disappointed, and satisfied: six Revels shouted "SURPRISE!" Six champagne-poppers went off almost right in his face, showering him in confetti. Something tickled his ear with a "FWEET-FWEE-EEEEET!" sound. One revel, mounted on the shoulders of another so that the two would match his height, put a paper crown on his head.

Gerrick knew to take it in stride. He affected a smile, feeling somehow that it would be rude to show stress in the house of the Jester Divine.

One of the revels shoved a drink into his hand. It looked like a citrus fruit punch. Another shouted "YAAAAY! The Laird has returned!"

"That's not the Laird!"

"well maybe he's a Baron then!"

"Baron what? Is it contagious?!"

Somewhere, Gerrick heard a rimshot. He could not tell where it came from.

"Well I think he's a Earl!"

"Oh? Why?"

"'Cause he's gonna Earl when we tell 'im what's in the punch!"

Gerrick looked at the glass of drink in his hand, alarmed.

As one all the revels chanted, ''"WAH WAH WAH WAAAAAAAH!"

"Ahhh!" Gerrick looked up at Father Wiggins. The old man spread his arms wide. "Come on in. Have a seat. I was expecting you."

Gerrick looked at him, not quite in suspicion, not quite in alarm, but he was noticing how often that sentiment came up tonight.

A revel ran up with a candle and set Father Wiggins' robes on fire.

Gerrick looked alarmed. "Uh--"

Father wiggins watched this event impassively, then turned to Gerrick. "Oh, I'm sorry. Do you mind if I smoke?"

Gerrick heard the rimshot again.

A revel ran up with a seltzer bottle. "Wow, you're on fire tonight, boss!" He sprayed the priest's robes, putting out the flame.

"Not any more!" Father Wiggins grinned. Gerrick heard the rimshot again.

Gerrick studdied them for a moment, and then ventured, "Is...that..."

"A new one." Father Wiggins nodded. "We've been practicing. You're our first audience."

Gerrick nodded, trying to hide his alarm. "It's...good. I like it."

Father Wiggins patted Gerrick on the shoulder. "No you don't lad. And that's why you're here." He guided Gerrick to a chair.

Gerrick sat down, "Nae, really, I'm just--"

"Tense. Yeah, we can feel it. It's epedemic in your family right now, but you seem to be Baron most of it tonight. So what's on your mind, Baron?"

"I need a blessin'." Gerrick sat forward, low and humble in his chair. "Any kind. At this point, I'll beg if I haftae. I'm aboot tae lead my friends on sommat dangerous, and I worry if I'm up tae the task."

Father Wiggins scrutinized him, then reached out with his hand, eyes closed. "Hold still."

Gerrick felt his hope soar, wondering what kind of Blessing Wiggins was giving him.

Father Wiggins lowered his hand, and regard Gerrick seriously. "Are you aware that someone used powers of the Scarred Mother on you earlier tonight?"

Gerrick sighed, defeated. "Aye. We cornered 'im on tha Red Dawn, tryin' tae sabotage. He got me good an' hard."

Father Wiggins squinted. "Losing any sleep?"

"Well, I'm up noo."

"Had any thoughts of suicide? Hurting yourself or others?"

Gerrick looked at his left hand.

"Loss of appetite?"

Gerrick thought about the dinner he missed. "Well...sorta."

"Easily irritable? lashing out?"

Gerrick bowed his head. "Aye."

"Hearing voices? Hallucinating?"

"Nae yet."

Father Wiggins went on. "Feelings of sadness disproportionate to or disconnected from real events?"

Gerrick shook his head. "I dinnae ken what's proportional any more."

"Loss of interest in your normal activities? Things that used to mean something to you?"

Gerrick looked up at him.

"Like say, attending services?" He gave Gerrick a meaningful, knowing smile.

Gerrick nodded, ashamed. "Aye."

He nodded. "At Hearth and Shell, they'll be understanding, but they won't understand. At the Vermilion Spear, they'll understand, but they won't be understanding."

Gerrick thought back on the tongue lashings he had recieved tonight, trying to puzzle through the sentence.

Father Wiggins took the opening. "It's not just the coming war, is it?"

Gerrick thought hard. "I...I dinnae think there was a point. I went oot walkin', tae think. I got ma foot caught in a trap, I thought I was gonnae die...Jonas foond me, carried me home...But I just kept thinkin', what's the point. Everythin's changin'. Nothin' I ken is right anymore. The Free-States, Marsaukan...here, ma home. I try tae draw a map, but the map keeps changin', and I dinnae ken what anyone wants from me."

Father Wiggins nodded. He held up one finger, smiling. "I got just the thing for you. So a Dhunnick, a Kieran, and an Innesian walk into the Nuckelavee's Arse and order beer. As they're drinking, a fly buzzes around and lands in the Dhunnic's beer."

Gerrick laughed.

Father Wiggins grinned. "Oh you know it?"

Gerrick shrugged. "It's one a' me favorites. Da's too."

"Well should I go on?"

"Please." Gerrick gestured to him.

Father Wiggins went on. "So the Dhunnic looks sour and shouts, 'Waiter! There's a fly in my beer! Bring me another!'"

Gerrick laughed at his exhaggerated, self-important Dhunnic accent.

"So a few minutes later, another fly buzzes around and lands in the Kieran's beer. The Kieran picks it out, and keeps drinking. A few minutes later, a third fly lands in the Innesian's beer." Father Wiggins held out his hand. A revel handed him a corked brown bottle with a brown label blazon with a cup. He handed it to Gerrick.

Gerrick took it. "What's this?"

"The punch-line. Use it when you need it." He smirked, shrugging. "It's got a fly in it."

Gerrick studied the strange gift.

Father Wiggins put another hand on his shoulder. "And Gerrick?"

Gerrick looked at him.

"Trust."

Gerrick studied him.

Father Wiggins nodded seriously. "Trust them. They love you. Even the new one."

Gerrick felt a warmth in his heart. He rose. "Thank ye."

Father Wiggins waved. "Come back anytime."

Gerrick walked out, now with a ray of hope in an otherwise bleak heart.

He heard a pitch pipe. Some of the revels gathered together. One of them sang.

"Soooooome things in life are bad, they could really make you mad..."

Gerrick waved them a salute, and left.